I was chatting with a donor before I drew his blood, and he was a dentist. when I actually drew him, there was just a little squirt of blood and it surprised him
I looked him in they eye and told him “you’re bleeding because you don’t floss”
and he went dead silent
had the opportunity and fucking seized it
My roommate and his girlfriend got in the shower together and they’re… Talking about politics?
I was expecting to hear “OH GOD, HARDER,” not “George Washington was entirely correct in his prediction of what distinct parties would do to politics as a whole.”
Nope nevermind, there it is, apparently political debate is just their form of foreplay
STOP REBLOGGING THIS HE HAS A TUMBLR
Telling your son not to “be such a girl” lets his sister who overhears the conversation know that being a girl is not a good thing and she should be sorry and ashamed of herself.
It also reminds your son that being a boy is better than being a girl and therefore he is better than any girl he will ever meet.
In russian if you cry you get called a cabbage. Vote to change “dont be such a girl to “dont be such a cabbage” say I.
If your girlfriend has sexual intercourse with another girl. Is that considered cheating?
If I’m right handed and I punch you with my left, did I really hit you?
I’ll reblog this every time.
Let’s raise children who won’t have to recover from their childhoods.
The best times to kiss a girl
When she’s babbling on about something. When you’re arguing. When you see her. When you’re with her. When you’re with your friends. When she cries. When shes happy. When she does something you love. After you ask her out. After she says she loves you. After you just kissed her. Before you leave. My point is, whenever you get the chance to kiss her, kiss her. It makes her feel loved.
if you kiss me when we’re arguing i will punch you straight in the fucking jaw